It’s 8 o’clock on a chilly Monday morning. No birds chirping, no sun rays pouring, no breeze, just a chilly morning with matatus hooting, people rushing to work, drivers impatiently waiting for the traffic lights to turn green; the simple description of a busy morning.
A young belle who seems to be in her early twenties is proudly walking in a skimpy dress which seems to be saying “Y'all better look at me because I run this town”. Besides her is a short somehow overweight guy who is holding her hand. It goes without saying that she is her boyfriend or are they siblings? I don’t think so, for there is no slight resemblance and even if one was adopted at least the walking style would somehow be similar. They finally end up standing next to me to wait for a bus. The stench of liquor coming from them subjects my nostrils to what seems to be an endless period of misery. Finally a bus pulls over and we start boarding it. The couple exchanges a hug and the unexpected happens, they exchange a kiss which doesn’t seem neither romantic nor passionate, instead, it seems misplaced and forced.
“Next weekend I will do you better than I did this weekend,” says the lad.
“You better,” she responds.
I take my seat next to the window and ironically, the same lady sits next to me. She takes out her phone and directly goes to text whoever seems to be her best friend. “Tumeachana na yule mninja..He is so pathetic in bed..Alafu I have to fake how much I like him. I thank God napatana na Jimmy leo jioni..Ata sikuji class this whole week, I gotta be with, my money making machine, JIMMY”. In that moment I find myself wishing that my prying skills weren’t so dang good. So apparently she is a university student with maybe two..three..five..or ten boyfriends.
That occurrence sends me thinking. What is happening to ladies? Gone are the days’ ladies used to keep their legs closed till the right man came along. When they used to totally respect themselves. Now most of them sleep with any Tom, Dick and Harry. Their obsession to achieve greatness has been reduced to an unhealthy fixation of social media where they post their arses to get a thousand likes. They don’t fall for the focused, uncool and wiseacre guys anymore, now they fall arse over tit for guys with tattoos, snapbacks and those who seem to have pooped in their undies. Divorced women or old spinsters have become scavengers who go after young guys seeking pleasure from them.
Why this? Is it a curse that has fallen upon us? Ladies, why can’t most of you wear a skimpy skirt or dress to look darn good but not to please a man? Why date a guy only because he is cool yet you are more than sure that he’ll cheat on you? Married women, why do you have to stoop so low and cheat on your husbands’ just because you realized that he has cheated or he is cheating on you- can’t you just leave him? And some of you, do you have to go partying then get so wasted to the point that a guy takes advantage of you yet you could have controlled yourself?
Maybe am the one looking at it wrongly but as we all know, saying the truth in this decanted mess called society earns you a ticket to the land of ‘fool Dom’. If women empowerment means that ladies have to be better than guys in ‘immoral’ ways, then we have all failed, society itself, parents and most of all, the women and ladies themselves. Why so- because a woman’s dignity is more valuable than a diamond and when it comes to competing with guys in anything that doesn’t help in building the society and oneself, women are at the larger losing end. Maybe all these changes are because we are in the 21st century, however, most of the changes we are seeing in our ladies, are they positive or negative?