She did not change me.He did not change me.No one changed me.I changed me.For years I have tried telling my story,but it has never gotten an end since everytime it takes a different turn.Everytime the storyline was the same,but the ending was always different and always about failure over and over again till one moment where time seemed to have stopped and my story finally found an ending.
It was a normal Friday night,the party was great.The guys on the floor were all turned up showing off their dance moves;the ladies on the other hand were busy shaking what their mamas’ gave them.It was a simple house party,the birthday girl and her friends lighting up the place.The guests were busy living the moment and dancing to the beat,no one loves a lazy and boring guest in such events anyway .The deejay was busy doing his job,everyone was having fun.Everyone but me.It had been a long week full of many frustrating events such that partying was the last thing I wanted but u know what they all say,”If a close friend calls you for a turn up,you do not fail to turn up.”
You know how in movies a guy and a girl who are meant for each other meet in an awkward manner and tension is built between them,well,in this case it did not happen like that.When he walked in,several of his friends lit up and welcomed him.I would not have noticed him if it wasn’t for his stylish and classy dressing code.He did blend in and soon I found myself on the dance floor so that I could at least get a chance to dance with him.People always say men want a lady who doesn’t even seem to notice them but mama taught me,if you want something,you don’t always stand to watch it leave or let it pass you,at times,you have to go get it cause maybe it is waiting for you.Of course I did not go grab him and I did not have to cause I was not the only one who had noticed the other.By the end of the night I had him to myself and left with his number.Little did I know that was the beginning of the end of my story.
Knowing someone takes time but what knowing someone mostly means to youths,is we get to know each other for a week or a month,we like each others’ pictures on social media,chat all day,tell each other why we are not dating and that he/she maybe your next real deal,tell your friends about that person and say maybe this time it will be the real thing if you end up dating and most of all,lying about how you can’t get that person out of your mind.All these were things I was used to but with him it was different,we did do some of them like chatting all day,missing each other and hoping that we will be each others next mistakes;then reality struck and it came to an end.He was not looking for a relationship and neither was I,we were both just looking for a stable,concrete and firm thing.
Struggling with issues like being a party addict,a passive drug user,a frequent serial monogamer,a dating fanatic and a victim of peer pressure can be very challenging.But it is not until you meet someone who helps you see that rushing into things is not what you really want,giving up on your dreams is a failure,being your true self no matter how weird you are to others is a source of pride,knowing your self-worth is important and knowing that you do not have to stoop low to fit in someone else’s world is not a crime.Many do not have someone like that,others do but are too blinded to see.His story is not so different from mine but for him,he changed himself from some of the mistakes he had made and from knowing that life is not a bed of roses and there are things you have to outgrow.Our tale does not end with us in church making vows,but it ends with a promise,”I will be in your life forever,not to change you for you are perfect as you are, but to be with you as you take your steps cause when people judge you or let you fall,I will be there to pick and help you push on.”